I never imagined that I would see them waddling through the Hub, past the second floor classrooms and the interior design department all the way out to the parking garage. Never in a million years. I thought I would be safe from their presence at a top fashion school. Spared from their visual assault. And yet I saw them as clearly as one sees the sun, the sky and the trees of Atlanta.
Sagging pants.
They were inexplicably belted below the gluteus maximus of a young man wearing plaid boxer shorts. They
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gathered about the knees and flowed over the athletic shoe causing the young man to take measured steps like some bound-footed geisha or ankle-cuffed felon. Their back pockets, filled with wallet and cell phone, challenged the very nature of gravity. The swoosh of their folds upon folds called out to me. Pleading with me to stare at the color coordination of the boxers with the young man’s shirt. I averted my eyes in protest but the image had already left a permanent bruise on my cerebrum.I’ve asked everyone possible the same question we all think whenever we cross paths with this fashion statement. Why? Is it more comfortable to belt one’s pants around the thighs? Is it sexy to waddle? Is it cool to expose one’s underpants for all the world to see? Is there a need for more room in the crotch that baggie or loose fitting jeans won’t provide? If the idea is to wear the pants in a looser fashion then why do some of the sagging pants fit so snugly around the calf muscles? No one has offered a definitive reason. If I just knew why, I feel as though I might be more at ease with the style.
I’m lying. I hate it.
Year after year, the style just won’t die. The pants dip lower with each passing season. I see drawers at the mall, drawers at the grocery store, drawers at the gas station and now drawers at a fashion school. The style is so pervasive that states such as Florida, Tennessee, Alabama and Mississippi have crafted laws against it.Yet, I don’t agree that there should be any such law banning the sag. Instead, I want parents to get involved. I want men who wear their pants properly to take a stand. I want wearers of sagging pants to catch a clue and grip it tenaciously. I want belts to find their home back on hips. I want underwear to actually be worn under outerwear.
I want the sag to stop.
