It is not uncommon in the south for a stranger to approach you and say hello or to ask you how you’re doing, but as a young woman living alone in Atlanta, sometimes I am weary of southern hospitality. Walking along Peachtree Street, I have noticed it does not take much for a polite greeting to turn into an unintended invitation for harassment. Even a smile can lead to unwelcome sexual advances, inquiries about my age, name, number and where I’m going — all information I am uncomfortable giving to a strange man following me on the street.
This problem is not unique to me. In a survey conducted by stopstreetharessment.com, 65% of participants reported experiencing street harassment at least once. These women experienced lewd comments, honking and stalking all while completing daily activities like going to the store.
Some people trivialize street harassment, claiming that it is innocent, just a joke or a man simply trying to compliment a woman. However, these people have not experienced the discomfort of sexual comments being directed at them while they shop for groceries or the fear caused by being followed to their car after persistently saying no.
Just like many southerners, I was raised to be polite and speak to people, but I fear my politeness will open the door for unwanted comments about my body or an inquiry about personal information I don’t want to divulge. Now, I refuse to smile, even as men shout at me, “damn girl, why are you so mad?” My frown is a form of self-protection, the only armor I have against unwanted advances from men who do not understand how their words violate my body and sense of safety.
So if you see a woman and she doesn’t smile or doesn’t return your greeting, don’t assume she is mad at the world or has a defect personality. That frown may be the only thing that makes her feel safe in a society that still refuses to acknowledge her fear.
